well, hey there...

Hi. Member me?

It's been a while, bloggies...February to be exact.

I've missed y'all.

To be honest...I've been running low on inspiration, and my mind has just been blank, unlike the activities in my life. There's always something brewin' there. So, I've decided it's best to sum up the last 3 months in a quickie: Lesgo

February brought on the BEST bachelorette weekend in the history of the world! We celebrated the upcoming nuptials of our sweet friend, Katie in West Palm Beach. Dancing, beach yoga, more dancing, blackberry mojito's, Sir Mix-a-lot dancin', expensive taxi cabs, dancing the night away, and LOTS of laugh's. I love these girls so much!

March delivered the most beautiful, and FUN wedding of all time. True Story! Isn't she just lovely? I don't think I've cried this much since my own wedding! Redic, I know! I felt so incredibly honored to share such a special day with my precious sister friend, and even more grateful that God chose these two to spend forever together. Patrick, you did real good :) Here's to happily ever after!

April was full of birthday's and anniversaries! Such a happy month! I'm officially in the last year of my twenties...which is a very odd and surreal feeling that I can't really describe, and to be honest...it hasn't sank in yet. Hmph. Nick and I also rang in 7 years April 29. Yeah! We continue to stand in awe of God's faithful demonstration of unconditional love and forgiveness that's displayed in marriage. Thank you, Jesus that you've given me this man to love and cherish always. May I never take that precious gift for granted. Oh, and we gained a new addition to our family: Buddy our adopted German Shepherd. He's a sweetie, and although he ain't the sharpest crayon in the box, Nick loves him to pieces, and I'll take one for the team. Maybe our next addition will be a baby human :)

May! You be crazyyy!!! I ran/walked/trotted/something like that my first Color Me Rad 5k. SO MUCH FUN!!! It's official: I will be doing this every year. Amen.

And now we are well into the second week of June. Dang.

This summer will be full of visits with friends, and family, baby brother's high school graduation, TONS of sun on the boat, and maybe a home project or two.

Love y'all!

xo

my hang up

People...I feel like I need to get something off my chest.

I have a hang up, and I think hope that if I get it out...this will be a step towards moving past this insanely ridiculous deal I'm struggling with.

Ugh. Here goes.

I have an issue with having people in my house. Dinner's. Social gatherings. Holiday's. I just have problems.

Now, it's not that I don't like people. Quite the opposite! I LOVE entertaining, and genuinely enjoy my company once their here...it's just the whole process leading up to it that puts me in a tizzy. I'm even nervous (like literally breaking out in a sweat) writing y'all this because...well it makes me feel vulnerable as crap, and it's no longer a secret. But I'm puttin' on my big girl panties, and goin' for it.

I don't know why I feel this way. Nick and I were both raised in homes that had an open door policy with all our friends, family, and neighbors. My Mom always had an 8th place setting set at the kitchen table for one of our many friends who stayed over for dinner, and you could always find someone sleeping on the couch on a Friday or Saturday night. We didn't have organized bedrooms (heck there were 7 of us living in a 3 bedroom house) perfectly matched furniture/dishes, or stain free carpet...but our home was always a revolving door open to anyone, and everyone.

Somehow I have lost sight what I knew growing up.

Upon having company I now feel inadequate...like the fact that we have blue paint on our bedroom walls with a champagne/olive bedspread because we changed our mind 4 years ago on paint colors...and still haven't gotten around to fixing it. Or that our dining room table is the only piece of blonde wood currently in our house because I had a thing for blonde wood 7 years ago (and a new dark wood table just ain't in the budget). Or that we have mega crazy cracks all across our ceramic tiled floors. Hello area rugs! Or that our guest bedroom is filled with boxes becuase my dear husband likes to hold on to every blessed thing. I mean really who gives a flying crap?

So there we go. It's out. I have issues, y'all, and I'm really wanting to overcome this. I want my home to be a welcome haven no matter if there are dishes in the sink, or there's 5 pounds of dust on the blinds. That's life, right? I want people to know you will always have a place to crash, and food to fill your belly...because at the end of the day that's all that matters.

People matter. Not things.

So, come on over, and if I haven't invited you yet...just come. I can't promise that you won't have to drink out of a red solo cup, or that you might leave with some Blue Kitty hair on your tush, but I can promise that you are welcome.

Happy Tuesday, friends. I'm grateful for y'all :)

xo!

21 days

Well hey, y'all! Dang! It's been a bit since my last post...so Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year, and gosh while we're at it...Happy early Valentine's Day!

Sowey...

Time has gotten away from me this month with spending the Holiday's up North with my family, and getting the blessed flu/strep for 2 weeks over New Years. Amazing. Who DIDN'T get sick?? Crazzzy!

Anyways, I've been praying, and struggling with posting my thoughts here for a few reasons...but my hope is that in sharing my heart here today it may encourage someone to take the next step (if God so calls you to do so) in their walk with Christ, and truly lay down whatever He leads you to sacrifice in order to truly be in tune to hearing His voice.

Yesterday was the last day of my 21 day fast, and WOW what an experience!

Meat, dairy, sugars, breads, alcohol...

and...

c.a.f.f.e.i.n.e.

Yes, this was going to be a challenge for me physically, mentally, and spiritually. I've never really had to really "limit" myself on certain foods, so feeling called to follow something so strict was new, and kinda exciting for me.

 I'm a freak. I know.

So that limited me to fruits, vegetables, beans, whole grains, and water. Time to get mega creative with meal planning! Nick has been uber supportive which is a huge blessing, and even developed a taste for spinach and black bean burger salad's :) Thanks so much for your encouragement, babe! I think I'll keep ya around :)

 I soon found out how often I gravitated to a quad venti caramel macchiato, a pretty glass of Cabernet, or even a flippin' chocolate chip cookie when I needed a little something for the soul. So instead of making a trip to the kitchen, I detoured to my Bible, my journal, and a cup of hot (decaf) tea. I poured my heart out to God, sometimes in tears of human frustration because I just really wanted coffee...and other times in sheer realization of just how small I am, and how BIG, mighty, and powerful He really is. I scribbled down thoughts, feelings, prayer requests, anything and everything. Honestly, there were some days that I just wasn't "feeling it" and thought about throwing in the towel. This was just too hard. 21 days...

I quickly learned that this time of fasting had more to do with placing myself in a position to truly hear God’s voice than it ever had to do with any kind of food restrictions or limitations. God honors sacrifice.

People, this process has been so amazing for me, and I will tell any one of you who may be on the fence about doing something like this...DO IT! You will be amazed how God meets you where you are when you are 100% reliant upon Him.

Thank you, Lord for being my supply...always. You are so good to me.

the newest addition to ttpd!

Yesterday was an awesome milestone for our family.

Nick was sworn into Temple Terrace Police Department! YAYYYYY!!!!

Ever since he was a little boy...Nick has wanted to be a police officer. His mom has shown me countless pictures of a little 4 year old with plastic handcuffs clipped into his belt loop, and a plastic gun stuck in his pocket.

This has been his childhood dream that has now become our ever present reality.

Most of you know that Nick has served as a Reserve 2 Sergeant for Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office for 4 years. And now, the next page in our future book is turned.

The Chief of Police spoke to Nick and I directly, and thanked me for giving my husband over to this agency. This now meant that Nick wouldn't always be home for every holiday, family gathering, or special occasion. His main priority will always be family, but when duty calls...you go. That's why this is not a career...it's a calling. He reminded Nick that along with his integrity, he must never bring disgrace to his uniform, and always bring pride to the badge that he wears. There is something so amazing about the unity and brotherhood that bonds law enforcement and fire fighters. It gives me chills to know, and experience that kind of self sacrifice. I have never been more honored, proud, or felt such love and respect for my husband than in that moment. This is me getting all mushy.

Then I got to pretend to pin on Nick's badge...and then proceeded to go back to my seat with it. Leave it to me to start a chuckle, and mess up a moment. Oops!

Before closing, the Chief offered family and friends to come and pray protection, and prosperity over the two new officers. LOVED this!

Thanks to the amazing multitude of friends, family, and our extended family from HCSO in supporting us in this new and exciting change in our life.

Blessed. So blessed.

Let's do this!

Much love,
K

marriage: what i'm still learning...

In a few short months, Nick and I will be celebrating our 7th wedding anniversary.

I feel like that's a lot...seriously...but in the grand scheme of things...it's not a super long time. That being said, this by no means makes me an expert on marriage, but I do feel like I have grown a great deal from the ups and downs of these past 7 er ish years, and am still learning. Is that weird?


I'm learning that you can be married, with the preacher, and pretty shiny rings, and even have the most ideal honeymoon imaginable...but still fail to be "one flesh." So important. Such a process. Your dead in the water without it.

Nick likes soda for breakfast, and no amount of nagging or lecturing will change that. So, here's to lattes and icy cold coke's. You win some, you loose some. Meh!

Love takes sacrifice. Get married and realize in a hot second how selfish you actually are.

I'm learning that God designed marriage to make us more holy than happy. The longer I'm married...the more this simple truth makes sense. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying marriage doesn't make you happy. Quite the opposite! But it's a constant reminder of the refining process of holiness. Thank you, Jesus.

Be a team. Think like a team, and don't leave your team.

I'm learning that you must trust each other with everything. Always.

Talk. Communicate, but know when to table a convo that just won't end. Revisit it later.

I'll never understand "Gold Rush" or why Nick likes it, but I do know that he loves having couch company.

Forgive. Forgive. Forgive.

Make dinner. Yes...cook, and while your at it, bake a little something sweet too! You can do it!

I'm learning that there's power in all words. They build up, and tear down in seconds. In my quiet time yesterday I read in Proverbs 12:18 "The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." How many times have I been that reckless fool?

I'm learning that even though I moved the laundry hamper a whole 4 more steps from the bathroom to the closet...the clothes still. just. won't. actually. make. it. inside...ever.

My spouse is NOT my enemy. We make sure to remind each other of this mid-argument, and it always puts things back into perspective.

I'm learning that little "happy's" make any day a whole lot brighter. The other night Nick came home with something behind his back, and with a sweet smile he pulled out a pack of mini colored sharpie's, and sour patch kids. I love that he knows and loves the little things about this girl.

That's what I'm still learning, peeps. What is/has marriage taught y'all?

XO!
K

grandma stanley

Sweet readers...

The other night I was needing to vacate from life for a smidgen. I was emotional, and possibly even a little lot moody. Why I totally support a healthy glass of vino in times like this...I was needing something else. Something familiar.

I soon found myself in the guest bedroom, starring up at a pink box on the top shelf of the closet. My memory box. Now while I'm not a big "let me keep every little card/trinket/whatever I've ever been given in my lifetime" kind of person...there are a few things that hold extreme value to me, and go into that very box. This was exactly what I needed.

I curled up on my bed with my dog, and lifted the lid...I was immediately overcome with emotion. You see, most of the items in my box are reminders of my Grandma Stanley. She passed away at 62 right after I graduated from high school. She and I had a special and very unique relationship that I will always treasure.

This is my Grandma Stanley.

Isn't she stunning? This was her high school graduation. She use to be a school bus driver, but soon quit to help my Papa manage his painting company. My Papa was illiterate, so my Grandma kept up the books for him.
I was her very first grandchild, and from the day my Mom found out she was pregnant, she began to journal letters to me. She always said she would love me regardless if I was a boy or a girl, but was secretly over the moon when she heard I was a girl!

She was an amazing story teller...voice inflections and all! Some of my sweetest memories of her is when she would read my two favorite books for the millionth time "Babar's Travels" and "Are You My Mother" which she use to say I memorized, because I "read" right along with her, and always knew when she skipped a page. Chance and I use to snuggle up with her on the couch as she gently swept the hair off our foreheads, and would take us on exciting and thrilling adventure's with her incredible story telling mind...but always made sure it ended with "happily ever after." Mom's bedtime stories just never could compare...sorry, Mama.

I thought Grandma Stanley was magical because she somehow made a red stop light turn green after saying, "Ab bra Ca dabra 1, 2, 3...change!" and it did. Every dang time.

One day she took me to buy a doll, and out of all the amazing and pretty dolls available...I picked Maggie.

Trust me...she use to be a lot cuter...and not so children of the corn looking.
Maggie was simple and obviously handmade, but I was instantly connected to her. After years of love, and suffocation, Maggie was sent to Grandma Stanley's for a full body makeover. She would re-sow her fingers, toes, head, and butt back on, and send her back in a box to FL with a prescription bottle filled with Hershey kisses, and smelling like Bounce dryer sheets.

I use to go pick tomato's, cucumber's, and onion's out of her garden, and she would make tomato salad with salt, pepper, and Italian dressing.

This is the last picture I have of her.

 She fought hard...but wasn't at all afraid of death. I've never seen her look more peaceful. She knew. She was welcomed into eternity.

As I went through the box piece by piece I felt the hot tears stream down my cheeks. How much I missed her. I don't typically dwell on the fact that she's no longer here, because I know she's dancing barefoot on streets of gold, and pain free in her new perfect body with the King of Kings. I picked up her bottle of old perfume, closed my eyes, and breathed in her. Y'all, I sware it felt like she was right there. She always wore Boucheron. That was one of the things I asked my Papa if I could have when she passed away. Isn't it amazing how you can remember someone so clearly by their scent?

I allowed myself to be sad for a bit longer, wiped my mascarra stained cheeks, and quietly thanked my faithful God for giving me such a priceless gift. Because of Grandma, I have my beautiful Mom, and because of my Mom, I am fortunate to have the amazing family that I have.

My cup runneth over. Truly.

I love you, Grandma, and can't wait for the day that I will see you again!

All my love,
Kristin Renee'

moody monday

Not gonna lie y'all...I'm in one sour mood today, and honestly it's just a bunch of life.

1.) I woke up to a mouthful of painful blisters things this morning...thanks to an extra whitening mouth wash that's from satan himself. These are terrible! All inside my bottom lip, and under my tongue...what? It's enough to make you want to cry because they hurt so b a d l yyyyyy. Skip the mouth wash peeps, cause this is crap!

2.) The big truck started acting up, so I had to drive it into work this morning...which makes total sense because, hello?...I work at a car dealership. But I was running late because I was messing with my new bangs (annoyance #3) and lost track of time. So I threw it into high gear, jumped in the beast truck to be greeted by the dinging diesel light, mumble a lot of useless mumbo gumbo, drive to the gas station, put just enough in to turn the light off, mumble more because I forgot my jacket and I'm shivering...it's a a chilly 54 degrees, and finally make my way into work...with mud on my black pants from the dirty truuuuuuuck!

3.) The bangs. Do we like them? Do we hate them? It just depends on the day...meh!
4.) Today is GORGEOUS!!!! I just want to be home, open all the window's, light my pumpkin spice candles and clean! Fabulous fall weather like this energizes me to clean, clean, clean! But instead, I'm at work, work, work.

5.) Some relationships in my life have taken a hard hit as of late, and today was no exception. What is going on? I know I just gotta keep things in perspective, and truly believe that no matter what, God has it under control, and under His feet, but y'all...this sucks. I'm just feeling defeated and frustrated.

So enough with my insignificant complaining, I think I just needed to vent a smidge.

Thanks for listening, or laughing, or whatever. I pray the rest of your Monday is delightful, blogsters!

xo!
K